Today is my birthday; they're smoking cigars -- or at least according to the Sugar Cubes they are. It's also two years to the day since I realised something was seriously wrong with me as the symptoms of jaundice set in: itching, irritiability, diarrhoea, lethargy. So it's an anniversary to celebrate, as five-year survival rate for men in the UK with pancreatic cancer is 2%; I'm 40% of the way to beating the index.
Today was another PET scan: more fasting and having radioactive glucose markers injected into your veins. A PET scan works by having a hormonal marker attach itself to cancerous cells which show up as radioactive when passed through a scanner. On top of this, there's a CT scan: high-definition imaging to show exactly where in the body the cancerous cells are located.
You always get valium to relax you before the scan; not because the claustrophobia might get to you but because you don't want to have your muscles taking up the marker and returning false positives. Normally with CT scans, you have to drink iodine diluted in lemon squash to improve the imaging, but this would interfere with the PET so isn't distributed. Apparently the boffins have discovered that aniseed performs the same trick without the interference, so that's what I had to drink today.
The PET is a long drawn-out business: it's full body so takes upwards of an hour and you have to lie motionless (and not say anything) for an hour beforehand while the marker takes up. I remain unconvinced that any amount of valium will prevent me from thinking about the results, which I won't find out for six weeks.
Not sure if these pants are aimed at couch potatos, geeks, or just those who want to be played with... Anyway, you can order them here.
This article from the Financial Times describes how the notion of the food pyramid is under review in the U.S., with much lobbying from all sides. The food pyramid shows how much of our diet should be carbohydrates, protein, fruit, etc. and schools in the States have to follow its recommendations when providing for children. With a third of the U.S. population overweight or obese, it's important that the administration gets this one right, but already interested parties have entered the fray. The Atkins group is trying to reduce the level of carbohydrates the government recommends, while sugar and particularly salt producers feel they could be under threat given the current diabetes rates. The pyramid needs some refinement too, as there's currently no distinction between saturated and unsaturated fats and the standard portions all vary anyway: one portion of fruit is not equal to one portion of leafy vegetables. It begs the question, who understands the pyramid anyway? Show us how much of what food we should be eating on a daily basis for a balanced diet! If nobody can grasp what the pyramid means, the debate about what should be in it will be pretty pointless.
It's coming up to a fortnight since the company I work for was acquired (by a company that itself was simultaneously merged or acquired). But just because we're in the big league now doesn't mean that our bosses have lost the personal touch or no longer care for our welfare. Not only have they offered us a chance to socialize with our clients by playing polo with them next month, but witness these (paraphrased but accurate) emails from CEO:
To: London-Staff
Date: 17/08/04
Subject: Staff Satisfaction
As part of my personal commitment to the health and wellbeing of all staff, I have arranged (on your behalf) for daily delivery of 100% pure fruit smoothies from the juice bar. They are delivered here for £3 per large (1.25 pints) or so.
The plan is to select one variety daily. They will be delivered here by 10.am.
You can do it every day or as often as you like.
According to an article in the American journal Fertility and Sterility, the later in life a woman has her last baby the less like she is to contract ovarian cancer. Hormonal factors mean that you're 58% less likely to contract ovarian cancer if you have carry your a pregnancy to term after the age of 35. And if you have four children, you reduce the risk by 64%.
Individual Savings Accounts (ISAs) were introduced a number of years ago now as a way of encouraging people to save money and invest in the stock market. You can invest up to £3000 per tax year in mini-cash ISAs, but in addition you can invest up to £3000 per tax year in a mini-equities ISA. Equities (shares) can offer you potentially far higher rates of return than cash, but there is risk involved and it is rather reliant on you picking the right fund.
However if you go to an independent financial advisor (IFA) looking for an equities ISA, you're going to pay a hefty sum up front for investing in a well managed fund. Up to 5% of the sum could go into fees and that comes straight out of what you were investing. A good way around this is to find an online funds supermarket, such as the Fidelity Funds Network. I've used this to buy an ISA and saved myself close to £100, so it's probably worth a look if you were considering this sort of investment.
A simile in the first person singular is art; in the first person plural it's politics; in the second person it's philosophy, in the third person it's journalism. Observe:
I am just like a fly trapped in a jar.
We are just like flies trapped in a jar.
You are just like a fly trapped in a jar.
They are just like flies trapped in a jar.
"The fourth wave of LCD technology is here", according to Sharp and temporarily my scepticism has deserted me.
Sharp has developed a monitor that gives images a 3D effect without having to wear special glasses. You can view games and design applications in 3D and possibly three-dimensional pivot tables in Excel, which seem to be de rigueur in accounts at my new company...
Just saw on Channel 4 News -- but haven't been able to find on the web yet -- a very funny extract from Fahrenheit 9/11 that had been cut from the film's release. It shows Dubya's new favourite to head the CIA, Porter Goss, admitting on camera that he's completely incapable of being recruited by the agency. He claims that he doesn't have the language skills, the technical ability or the expertise in the Middle East to add value to the CIA. Perhaps the Republicans will put this down to false modesty?
So Prozac has now been found in the nation's supply of drinking water; are we so surprised? Viagra is regularly found in the nation's spam.
I'm feeling a little tender about Microsoft at the moment; note that's tender about not tender towards. My imminent office move involves migration to Exchange and I'm not looking forward to it. As a consequence of using Exchange, we're not being forced to use Outlook as our mail client; it's just that if we use anything else we won't be able to use the office calendar or book meeting rooms.
And Outlook is pants. The interface is too involved, yet doesn't offer most of options of many other email clients. Message filtering and contact handling are weak and performance is particularly poor.
And that's without even considering security; apprentice hackers cut their teeth on VBScript in spam designed to trip up Outlook, and I have my doubts that Service Pack 2 will do anything to remedy this.
It goes hand in hand with any Microsoft technology; there's even a virus for Microsoft Pocket PC handhelds, and don't get me started on the IIS web server.
While it possibly isn't Microsoft's fault that there are so many viruses, bugs and general issues with its software -- and I don't want to be yet another one to jump on the Open Source bandwagon for no reason -- we are supposed to be technology savvy. There are good reasons for using Microsoft Windows as an operating system and even for Microsoft Office, but there are plenty of valid alternatives to Outlook and Exchange. If even we're capitulating, what hope for anyone else out there?
Found a bug in Internet Explorer: the last cumulative update prevents your browser from remembering the text size setting, which always reverts to medium. So I tried to submit this to Microsoft support...
All I could find was the Microsoft Wish site, which allows you to suggest enhancements to Microsoft products. This is the automated response you get:
We want to personally thank you for submitting Microsoft your suggestion. [...] Because of the volume this web site receives we can't guarantee that you will receive a personal response, but rest assured that your submission was received, reviewed, and routed.
I'm not saying you should be worried. But having seen the Home Office distribute their Planning for Emergencies leaflet -- has anyone actually received theirs yet? -- and the U.S. government decide that now is the time to act on four year old intelligence, I thought it my duty to point out these two anti-terror applications you can keep with you at all times on your Palm PDA.
Family Disaster Planner 2004 reminds us that "Disaster can strike quickly and without warning. It can force you to evacuate your neighborhood or confine you to your home. [...] Local officials and relief workers will be on the scene after a disaster, but they cannot reach everyone right away." You should be reassured by the fact that it was updated for military action in Iraq.
But how prepared should you be for the terrorist threat? Code Orange 2004 has the answers! It details the Homeland Security Directive and the five threat conditions for possible terrorist attack.
Your local official may not be there to help you when anthrax strikes, but your PDA will be.
Despite how many years is it now of new Labour, we see little in the way of redistribution of wealth. Indeed the underclass of sink estates, poor education and few prospects is still there, disaffected, hating asylum seekers and watching Big Brother as if it were Life on Earth. And they have nothing; indeed less than nothing. As this article from the excellent Motley Fool shows, half the population own only 3% of non-property wealth, but have a substantial share in the nations £3,000,000,000,000 debt. But who gives a damn about the chavs apart from the BNP?
As we continue to endure the fiasco at the Football Association, we see the Mail call for Sven's head, the Guardian want Geoff Thompson out, and many others want to see the back of David Davies. All right, so the whole thing is a public relations cock-up, but what do we expect from the FA?
Yet one person is emerging to head the newly streamlined FA: the erstwhile boss of Sport England, Sir Trevor Brooking. I'm not sure whose job he wants: Chief Executive (Palios), Chairman (Thompson), Executive Director (Davies) or Manager (Eriksson); probably a combination of all the executive posts. And I think he'll get it. He has loads of media connections and is universally approved of, from the right wing hard arses to the liberal beatniks to the red tops. No one seems to know why however.
Steve Jobs, Chief Executive and co-founder of Apple -- the computers, not the record label -- has had a neuroendocrine tumour resected from his pancreas, just like me! Not sure what my conclusion should be; my blog seems to be lagging a bit...
